Although people around me are considering me as an introvert, I always want to be friend with someone new. But, I found it’s pretty hard to make new friend. You can’t just being good friend with someone for no reason. It should be mutual and trusthworthy. I don’t have many friends and I even don’t know the real definition of friend that I should use. That is why I stuck with old friends, but old friends are easy to lost bond with and I also don’t know where the real bond lies. You just lost contact and feel very awkward to say hello again. Or you’ve a conflict with them that still not solved till today. Or you can’t trust them anymore. Or you found they’ve changed drastically and you didn’t feel comfort. Or it’s you who has changed and they leave you. I don’t think the urgency of making new friend is because my current friends are not good enough. It’s more because I need self-improvement. I’ve to meet new person often to kill this uneeded nervousness and anxiety, to learn how to speak properly, to be useful to other.
I’ve three close friend on the early days of highschool. I think we are good. Until grade XI, they went to science and only me who went to social class (actually I graded to language class but the headmaster remove the class that year because of only a few students that favor the language study. Hhhhh!). Then we only meet on extracurricular activities. Then graduation. One goes to college, one dissapeared and leaves no foot print and me began to struggling with real life. And yesterday, after make every efforts to search for a phone number on the internet and found it, I called one of them. We did talk a lot but it doesn’t last long and I don’t know why this short talk delivers full of joy. Now I’m more confident to make new friend. It’s worth it.